Autumn Games
by AspergianStoryteller
Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. Stories from on and off the court. Chapter 5: 'What I mean,' the Sumo Club captain elaborated, 'is I want you to have a sumo wrestling match with us.'
1. Dirty Game

_Autumn Games_

Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. I don't own Kuroko's Basketball. Fujimaki Tadatoshi does.

* * *

Chapter 1: Dirty Game

_Squeak! Squeak!_

_Bam!_

Hyuga caught the ball.

_Bam! Thud! Bam! Thud! Bam!_

He dribbled up the court, jab-stepped to the left and sent the ball flying past Fudoumine High's No. 9 to Izuki. He moved forward a couple of steps and passed to Kiyoshi.

_Bam! Thud! Bam! Thud! _

Hyuga. Izuki. Kyioshi. Izuki.

_Ppprrff!_

Hyuga almost dropped the ball. He shot Izuki a look of disgust. The other boy's eyes were wide in surprise.

There was soon an opportunity to shoot.

_Plappppt!_

The basketball hit the rim and fell down into Kiyoshi's hands. He secured the rebound and put Seirin up by two points. Hyuga's face burned.

'Hee hee hee! What was _that_, Hyuga?'

'Shut up!'

Five minutes later, Kagami was coming down at the hoop when -

_Pffffft!_

'Ugh!' The No. 7 and No. 6 chasing him backed away, holding their noses. The ball went in, but Kagami's face was crimson.

'Ha ha ha!'

_Pooot~_

Kagami gagged and tugged his shirt over his nose.

'Sempai! That's gross!'

'Yeah, Kiyoshi. What did you eat?'

Kiyoshi rubbed his chin in thought.

'Some rice, miso soup, Riko's new curry-'

'Throw in!' called the referee.

'That must be it!' Izuki said, moving into place.

_Bam! Thud! Bam! Thud!_

_Prrfftt! _

'Uhh, Seirin! What's wrong with you guys?' cried Fudoumine's No. 6.

XXX xxx XXX

'What is _wrong_ with you guys?' Riko hissed at break time. 'Why is everyone passing gas today?'

'Um, did you, by any chance, modify the curry recipe Kagami taught you?' Kiyoshi ventured to ask.

'I did... Are you saying this is my fault?'

'Maybe... Hey, don't get mad, Riko. We can use this!'

'No way!' Kagami cried. 'It's way too embarrassing! Our team will become a laughing stock!'

'He's right. Have your own fumes gone to your head?' said Hyuga.

_Pffffffff..._

'Koganei! Ten push ups!'

'How did you know?' he squeaked.

'You moved.'

'I moved?'

'You wiggled. Ten push ups! Anyway, you're doing fine. I think they're taking us seriously now, so be ready to up the pace when they do.'

'Of course,' Kagami grinned.

'I may change players partway through second quarter, depending on the situation. Until then, everyone on court give it your all! Bench guys, cheer them on!'

'Yes coach!'

...

'Alright, who did that!?'

...

'It wasn't me,' said Furihata.

'Oi, look at Kuroko!' Koganei cried. 'Look, he's blushing!'

'Kuroko-Kun! Was that you!?'

'It was! His ears are red!'

_Pfft..._

'Ho ho, was that you, Riko?' Kiyoshi grinned.

XXX xxx XXX

By the time the buzzer rang for halftime break, Fudoumine High almost sprinted off the court to escape the flatulent Seirin players, who were burning with embarrassment.

'That's it!' Riko screeched. 'All of you, to the toilets!' She banished them to the Fudoumine High gymnasium toilets.

_Pfffttt!_

_Plarrrt..._

_Pprrff!_

Riko cringed at every fart that came out of the boys' toilets. Thank Kami-Sama this was a practise match, not a tournament game; only some of the Fudoumine students were watching.

_How could this have happened?_ She wondered. _I hardly changed a thing in the curry! _

_Pooot~_

...

'Argh!'

'Ugh!'

'Ew! That's so gross!'

'Ew, Sempai!'

Riko jumped out of the way as her boys came rushing out of the toilets and slammed the door shut behind them.

'What happened?'

Kagami braced himself against the door.

'Kiyoshi really stinks,' said Koganei, fanning himself. 'We're not letting him out here.'

'Hey guys!'

'Please don't come out Sempai!'

'Come on! It's not that bad is it~'

'You stay in there, Kiyoshi!' Hyuga barked. 'Oi! Riko, what are you doing here? This is the boys' toilet!'

'I didn't go inside!' Riko snapped. 'I came here to discuss our strategy for the next quarter since it didn't look like you'd be out in time!'

'Through the door?' asked Furihata.

'It wouldn't be the first time.'

Koganei locked gazes with Mitobe and frowned. He swept his eyes over his team, lips moving as he counted heads.

'Hey, I might just be missing him again, but has anyone seen Kuroko? Is he with us?'

Seirin looked carefully amongst themselves for their No. 11.

'Oh no, did we trap him in there with Kiyoshi-Sempai?'

XXX xxx XXX

'I said I was sorry!' Kagami whined, holding his side.

Kuroko glared at him. Kagami could tell it by the slight dent in his brows.

'Come on, you know you're hard to find sometimes! You can't complain if it works against you sometimes.'

Kuroko sighed and his glare softened.

Kagami looked out over the court.

'Let's make them remember us properly,' he said, messing Kuroko's hair.

'Come on Stinky Seirin!'

'Grrr... That had better not become our nickname.'

_Bzzzz!_

'Start of the fourth quarter!' shouted the referee.

They started the quarter in a fluid, spread out formation. Fudoumine got the ball first and won 3 points, bringing the score to 63-59 (to Fudoumine). The gap quickly closed up as Seirin took back control of the court.

_Bam! Thud! Bam! Thud!_

'Where did the ball come from?'

'I didn't see it coming!'

_Bam! Thud! Bam! Thud!_

_Poot~_

'Oi! Stick to your mark!' No. 4 yelled.

'But he smells so bad!'

Hyuga face-palmed.

'Alright Seirin, everyone pass the ball to Kiyoshi whenever you can! He stinks the worst!'

'Hey!'

Kiyoshi and Hyuga's three-pointers soon brought them up to 63-66. There were two minutes to go when Fudoumine's No. 4 hollered,

'Harden up guys! It's only a bad smell!' and he went to mark Kiyoshi.

XXX xxx XXX

The game ended in Seirin's favour, 65-69, the last two points going to Fudoumine when their captain got past Kiyoshi to dunk.

_Bzzz!_

'Game over!'

'Yosha! High five Sempai- uhh- never mind!'

Running her hand through her hair, Riko sighed in relief.

'Thank Kami-Sama we won. Losing on top of flatulence would be too much.'

'Cheer up, Riko,' Koganei grinned. 'We'll be laughing about this next week.'

'I guess so.'

'Line up!'

'Thank you for the match!' Serin and Fudoumine bowed to each other, and Kagami fought to hold a fart in until they stood straight.

_Pffff..._

'I'm afraid to ask but why were you all farting?' No. 4 asked Hyuga.

'Ah, there was an incident with our lunch. It won't happen again.'

'What a shame, I thought it was really funny,' Kiyoshi chuckled.

Hyuga glared at him.

'You can fart on your own time, Kiyoshi. If you ever come to a game or practise smelling like that you'll be running laps and cleaning toilets for the rest of term.'

The basketball players were now scattered across the gym, chatting and cooling down.

'Aha ha ha ha! That's so lame! You're lucky this wasn't a tournament game!' someone was laughing. 'You should eat Subway or sushi before you play.'

'That was some awesome jumping, No. 10.'

'Whoa! Where did you come from?'

'I was here the entire time.'

_Plart!_

'Ugh! Just stop it already!'

'Haa... I guess we have to experience these things too.' Riko tapped her knee with her fingers, thinking. _We could have done better in game if we weren't too busy laughing or blushing to shoot properly. Yes, I could make them wear clown suits to our next practise..._

XXX xxx XXX

_Notes and translations_

Inspired by my dad.

Subway always does well during the Big Sing competition. I remember waiting in line with two dozen other students for dinner.

Number 4 in basketball (or at least in Japan) is worn by the captain. I don't think the other numbers mean anything in particular.

_Kami-Sama_: God. Kami is a general term for deities, actually.

_Sempai/Senpai_: upperclassman. A, honourific you had someone's name if they're your senior eg: in school, karate.

_Kun_: added to a juniors name, a student, a familiar person. Usually used on boys, but teachers may call a girl _kun_ to avoid the more cute or familiar feeling of _chan_, the more feminine equivalent.


	2. Kuroko's Scissors

_Autumn Games_

Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. Stories from on and off the court. Chapter 2: Kuroko stood up with the smaller scissors gleaming silver in his hand. 'Sit down and open your mouth, please.'

I don't own Kuroko's Basketball. Fujimaki Tadatoshi does.

* * *

Chapter 2: Kuroko's Scissors

'Ow!' Fukuda-Kun stopped in the middle of running laps across the basketball club's half of the gymnasium, hand clutching his jaw.

'What's wrong, Fukuda-Kun?' Riko-Senpai called. 'Why have you stopped running?'

'Ack! It's my braces, coach! I think some thing's broken.'

Riko-Senpai frowned and walked over Fukuda-Kun.

'Let me have a look. The rest of you keep running!'

Tetsuya kept an eye on them as he ran; this scene looked familiar.

_Squeak! Squeak! _

_Tap! Tap!_

'Haa! Haa!'

'Uh!'

Shoes on the wooden floor, training students and shuttlecocks striking rackets filled the gym with noise.

The other boys were snickering Fukuda-Kun as Riko-Senpai held his mouth open and pulled his lip down.

'The wire's frayed. There's a bit sticking out. Is it poking your lip?'

Fukuda said, 'Uh ha,' and Tetsuya jogged to the cupboard where they kept a large first-aid pack. The badminton club members (they had a tournament coming up) peered curiously at the mini-spectacle unfolding.

'Oof!' The first-aid kit was a bulky, heavy red pack that Tetsuya nearly dropped in his feet.

'Whoa! Where did you come from?' the badminton club's manager gasped at him.

'From the basketball club,' Tetsuya told her, hefting the pack back up into his arms. That was better.

'Oh, I see. Is someone hurt? Shall I call my coach back in?'

'No, it's alright, thank you.'

'I can't bend it it back into place,' Riko muttered.

'I can cut the loose bit, Riko-Senpai.'

'Kuroko-Kun!' she startled. 'You've brought the first-aid kit. Good.'

'Cut it?' Fukuda squeaked. 'Kuroko, do you know anything about braces?'

'This same thing happened to Midorima-Kun during a practise at middle school. I know what to do.'

XXX xxx XXX

_Teikou Middle School, First Gym. Nearly two years ago..._

'Mido-rin? What's wrong?' asked Momoi-San.

'My braces,' said Midorima-Kun. 'Something is poking my lip.'

'Here, let me see, Mido-rin.'

'Ah, it's alright Momoi-'

'I insist, Mido-rin. I'm your manager. _Sit._' She made Midorima-Kun sit down on a bench so she could look into his mouth. Akashi-Kun noticed and told everyone to keep working on their drill while he walked over to the benches.

'Is there a problem, Satsuki, Shintarou?'

'Mido-rin's braces are broken, Akashi-Kun.'

Akashi-Kun's eyebrow rose.

'Oh? Excuse me,' he peered into Midorima-Kun's mouth and pulled his lips. Midorima-Kun looked nervous.

Tetsuya started his jumping jacks so he could watch the bench properly.

'I see what the problem is,' Akashi-Kun hummed. 'The wire has frayed. I'll cut the loose thread off.'

'Cut it off!?'

'Do you want to continue practise with a wire poking into your flesh? I won't go easy on you.'

'...'

Akashi-Kun smiled.

'Trust me, Shintarou. Atsushi!'

Marusakibara-Kun looked to Akashi-Kun.

'Yeah?'

'Bring the first-aid kit here.'

'Sure thing, Aka-chin.' He looked pleased to stop doing push-ups.

'Daiki, Ryouta, Tetsuya, keep doing your drills. Shintarou is not a spectacle.'

'Yeah, sure he's not,' Aomine-Kun muttered. 'Hey, Tetsu, are you _still_ doing jumping jacks?'

'Haa- I'm done, haa- now.'

He joined Aomine-Kun and Kise-Kun on the floor for push-ups. Finally. Push-ups were better than jumping jacks.

'Haa.' _One._ 'Haa.' _Two._ 'Haa.' _Three. _

From the gym floor he could see through the space between Akashi-Kun and Marusakibara-Kun. Akashi-Kun was putting a small pair of medical scissors in Midorima-Kun's mouth.

'What are they – haa- doing, Kuroko-chi?' Kise-Kun asked.

'Haa- Akashi-Kun – haa, is cutting – haa - Midorioma-Kun's loose wire.'

'Really? Haa- Midorima-chi is brave-suu – haa!'

'There. I've fixed it for now, Shintarou, but you should see your orthodontist later.'

'Thanks, Akashi. Nanodayo.'

'You're welcome. Finish your drills now.' Akashi-Kun wiped the scissors clean on an antiseptic wipe as Tetsuya began his sit-ups.

'Atsushi, put this back and return to training.'

'Yeah.'

'Satsuki, we'll wash our hands before we continue practise.'

'Yup! Ew, I've got spit on my hands!'

'Make sure you haa - brush your teeth well tonight-suu!' Kise-Kun said to Midorima-Kun as he joined them on the court. Midorima-Kun grimaced.

'How the hell did you – haa - break your braces?' asked Aomine-Kun, easily doing his sit-ups.

'I don't know. Nanodayo.' Midorima-Kun huffed, jumping jacks next to Tetsuya.

XXX xxx XXX

Tetsuya rifled deftly through the first-aid kit. Across from the oxygen pack (something he was familiar with) were the tweezers and two different sized pairs of scissors.

The other boys had stopped running now and were watching curiously.

'Fukuda-Kun.' He stood up with the smaller scissors gleaming silver in his hand. 'Sit down and open your mouth, please.'

* * *

_Notes and translations_

This chapter is dedicated to my sister, because her little braces incident inspired it.

Please tell me if I've made any mistakes in how characters speak or address each other.

_Nanodayo_ (hope I spelled that right) – something you can end to the end of a sentence. Doesn't mean much, it's like a emphasis, like "you know." Similar to Naruto's _datebayo!_ which is often translated to "believe it!"

_Suu_ – something Kise often ends his sentences with, apparently. I read this in a wiki about Kuroko's Basketball.


	3. Note Taking

_Autumn Games_

Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. Stories from on and off the court. Chapter 3: Keeping an eye on the teacher, he penned a note on the back of a grocery receipt in his pocket, folded it, and carefully passed it backwards.

I don't own Kuroko's Basketball. Fujimaki Tadatoshi does.

* * *

Chapter 3: Note Taking

"_Hikaru lined up the hina dolls across the window sill and watched them with admiring eyes._

_'Hikaru, you really like the hina dolls, don't you?' Sachiko watched her son playing."_

Taiga paused. This manga was ringing a bell in his mind. Seriously. Keeping an eye on the teacher, he penned a note on the back of a grocery receipt in his pocket, folded it, and carefully passed it backwards. Kuroko's fingers plucked the paper from his and unfolded it behind his copy of their class reading material.

**Hey Kuroko, does this manga seem familiar to you?**

The note came back with Kuroko's tidy handwriting. (Taiga's eyes darted between Haruno-Sensei and his team mate so he could watch out for the returning note and Sensei's gaze at the same time..)

_This is my first time reading it._

**It's not that. Something in the manga reminds me of someone...**

Taiga's scrawl, still a bit shaky with his kanji, used the remaining space on the receipt so the note that came back to him was a receipt for vanilla milkshake at Maji Burger.

_Which someone?_

**Midorima I guess. He's not the same as Hikaru, but he's obsessed with horoscopes and those lucky items. Well, I don't know the guy as well as- **

His pen reached the edge of the paper. Quietly he fished around his pocket for another receipt and found one from Mizuno Books.

**-you. Do you reckon Midorima has autism?**

_Midorima-Kun has Asperger's Syndrome, a type of autism. Ah, I didn't know you shopped at Mizuno Books, Kagami-Kun._

**Whoa, seriously? That explains it. I get cook books from there.**

_I buy my favourite novels at Mizuno._

Several pages later, a thought popped into Taiga's head as he saw Hikaru join the special education class with other students.

**What about the other guys from Teikou? Does anyone else have – you know, something different?**

A library notice came to him this time, saying,

_Kise-Kun has ADHD and Aomine-Kun has dyslexia. I don't think the others have anything like that._

They were probably weird though. Genius types _always_ were...

**OK. I'm not going to go easy on them though. On the court they're just opponents.****It doesn't matter if they're "special."**

_How like Kagami-Kun to say that. _

**What? I'm not being dis- you know, judging them for being different. I'm judging them by their basketball!**

_Discriminating. I know what you mean. You're a good guy, really._

**What's that supposed to mean?**

_Keep reading or Haruno-Sensei will catch you._

**Watch out for yourself, Kuroko. Haruno-Sensei is sharp eyed, **

but he ducked his head into his book.

_He is sharp. _

**Almost as much as Arai-Sensei. Remember when he caught you sneaking in late?**

_Remember when he caught you sleeping?_

There was no room left on the library notice, either side, so Taiga tore a blank page from his note book to write on.

**Oi, how do you deal with Kise? The other day he sent me a video during class and I got detention. And **_**coach**_** was mad at me too! **

_You should have turned your phone off or put it on silent._

**I was caught off guard. **

**I forgot to ask. Did Kise send you the same video he sent me? You got a message at the same time.**

_Yes. Considering it's Kise-Kun, he probably sent it to everyone from Teikou and Kaijou._

**That idiot. Gangum Style has been on TV and the radio every day. Why does he need to send us the YouTube link?**

Kuroko's answer came back on a new piece of note paper, and arrived with another note that read,

please pass this to Mamiya-Kun

Taiga passed it backwards and read,

_Kise-Kun likes that sort of music. He must have gotten excited. He always did this at middle school too._

Pass this to Fujimoto-Kun

**How come people keep using us to get notes around class?**

_Because we rarely get caught, I guess. Ah, can we use a different kind of herb in cooking class? I can't afford saffron._

**Saffron? Oh, crap, I misspelt that! Saffron is really expensive! I meant Moroccan seasoning. Sorry.**

_Wow. Kagami-Kun, your spelling is really bad._

**Shut up! I got used to English spelling.**

_Then why are your written English tests so bad?_

Hey Kagami, how come you're not in the cooking club? From Oda.

**I'm busy with the basketball club.**

_You can be in more than one club, Kagami-Kun. I'm in the library committee._

**Oi, are you reading over my shoulder?**

_Sorry. The writing was so big and flashy I couldn't help it._

This was on a new note page again.

Aw, come on! You're one of the best cooks in class! At least think about it. I know lots of people who are in two clubs.

_Yeah. At least think about it, Kagami-Kun._

**Uh, fine. I'll think about it. Don't nag me!**

Hey Kagami-Kun! If we end up doing a food thing for the school festival you're on kitchen duty! How are you at breakfasts? From Osakada.

_Oi Kagami, there's a rumour about a ghost in the gym! Is it the same ghost that was haunting Teikou school? _

_I think they're talking about me._

**I'm not surprised. **

**The ghost is Kuroko. He's sitting behind me. And he's not a ghost.**

Oh. I was kind of hoping... well, my cousin is a霊媒. I want to see her working.

**Can you translate this Kuroko?**

_It means someone who deals with spirits._

Have you finished reading, Kagami-Kun?

The latest note was on office paper.

**No. Why?**

Maybe you're too busy passing notes.

**I didn't ask everyone use me as a pass lane.**

Why don't you stop then?

**Who is this?**

This is Haruno-Sensei. 

Taiga jerked his head up. There was sensei, looking knowingly at him.

_Oh crap..._

XXX xxx XXX

12.15 pm

From Aomine-Chi

_((Oi Kise! Don't send me stuff during class time. I got detention because of you))_

* * *

12.30 pm

From Momoi-Chi

_(( XD Ki-Chan!))_

* * *

12.32 pm

From Midorima-Chi

_((Don't send me stupid things, Kise. That video is ridiculous.))_

* * *

12.34 pm

From Kise

_((At least you watched it XD))_

* * *

12.36 pm

From Midorima-Chi

_((Idiot. Takao stole my phone when I was checking my messages.))_

* * *

12.46 pm

From Akashi-Chi

_((Ryouta, don't text me during class.))_

* * *

4.04 pm

From Murasaki-Chi

_((How like Kise-Chin))_

* * *

6.13 pm

From Kasamastu-Senpai

_((Don't text in class, dumbarse! You're gonna give me 40 push ups tomorrow!))_

* * *

6.20 pm

From Kagami-Chi

_((Don't text me during class you idiot. And why Gangum Style? It's already all over the TV. I don't need it on my phone. Bugger off))_

* * *

6.23 pm

From Kuroko-Chi

_((You shouldn't be using your phone during class, Kise-Kun.))_

XXX xxx XXX

_Notes and translations_

The manga their class is reading is called _With The Light _by Keiko Tobe. It's a fictional-but-educational series about raising an autistic child in Japan. I read it in a library. It's pretty cool.

霊媒 – spirit medium


	4. Automatic

_Autumn Games_

Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. Stories from on and off the court. Chapter 4: _((The door will open automatically in ten minutes or when you press __**Open))**_

I don't own Kuroko's Basketball. Fujimaki Tadatoshi does.

* * *

Chapter 4: Automatic

'Geeze, this is taking ages,' Kagami-Kun muttered. Tetsuya squirmed behind him. The line for the mall toilets really was moving slowly. He almost regretted ordering that extra large milkshake. Almost. It was a good deal. Extra large vanilla milkshake for him, extra large fries and triple barbecue burger for Kagami-Kun.

'Maybe the other toilets are free now?'

'I doubt it. If we leave this line now we'll have wait even longer.'

Kagami-Kun sighed.

'You're right. Hey, are you OK? That was a pretty big milkshake.'

'I am alright.'

The other boy looked him up and down.

'Sure you are. Hey, what are those?' he pointed to a couple of doors beside the entrance to the men's toilets. The line there was much shorter than the one they were in.

'Ah. Those are electronic toilets. The kind with automatic flush.'

'Techno toilets? I've heard of those.'

The classical music played while people did their business mingled with the pop music playing inside shops. The light above one door turned green as it slid open for a salary man to exit. A teenage girl walked in next and the light turned red.

'Do you want to join that line instead?'

'Well, I'm curious. I've never seen an electric toilet before.'

Tetsuya hadn't used one either; a normal toilet was fine for him. But then again, there was a first time for everything. And their line was really long.

'Let's go then,' he said.

XXX xxx XXX

_Ding!_

_Zzz..._

An elderly man left the cubical. The boys were now next in line. Kagami-Kun stepped back and gave him a push.

'You go first. I can wait a bit longer.'

'Thank you, Kagami-Kun.' Tetsuya stepped through the door and pressed the **Close Door **button.

_Ding!_

_Zzz..._

Tetsuya smiled as Kagami-Kun disappeared from his sight.

_((The door will open automatically in ten minutes or when you press __**Open))**_ a computerised female voice filled the room. Her announcement was followed the sound of classical Japanese string instruments and shakuhachi flutes.

It was larger than a usual toilet cubical, with grey tiled floor and walls, shiny surfaces and bright lighting. There were no taps at the sink.

The toilet has no lid, but everything proceeded normally and Tetsuya decided that since he had plenty of time left, he may as well take a dump too.

_((The toilet will flush automatically when you stand up))_ said the computer lady as he sat down, startling him.

_Ding!_

_Zzz..._

To his shock, the electric door opened, halting the music, and a man in a black business suit, texting on his cell phone walked in. Tetsuya yanked his school bag over his lap.

'Um, excuse me, sir,' he said, 'I'm still here.'

The man didn't notice him over the music from outside. Still texting, one hand hit the **Close **button, then moved to fumble with his belt.

'Sir!'

_((The door will open automatically in ten minutes or when you press __**Open))**_

Finally he looked up from the phone and yelped,

'Shit! Where did you come from!?'

'I was here when you came in. The door opened by itself.'

'T-that's the point isn't it?'

'It shouldn't have opened yet,' Tetsuya explained, feeling very surreal. 'I haven't used up my ten minutes yet.'

'Oh.'

_Bzz! Bzz!_

'Two pm, that's more like it,' muttered the intruder, glancing down at the message.

_Ah, he's forgotten me._

'Sir?'

'Ah, ah, OK. I'm sorry. I'll just- oh!' The red-faced man zipped his pants back up and buckled his belt. He bowed to Tetsuya and scrambled out of the room. Unfortunately, in his haste, he left the door open.

Oh damn.

'Oi, Kuroko! Where'd you disappear to?'

Tetsuya had never been so thankful to hear Kagami-Kun's loud voice. Oh but this was going to be awkward.

'Um, I'm in here, Kagami-kun!' he called. 'Can you close the door from outside? I can't reach!'

His team mate's head popped into view. It immediately turned as red as his hair.

'Whoa!' He turned around. 'What the hell, Kuroko!?'

'Please close the door.'

'Why is it open? And there's no "Close" on this side.'

'I can't reach from here.'

'Then get up and – oh. Ugh... hang on.'

Kagami-Kun stepped backwards into the toilet cubical and closed it from inside.

_Ding!_

_Zzz..._

'Hurry up and finish,' he muttered, ears red.

When his face stopped burning, Tetsuya decided, he would thank Kagami-Kun.

'Oi,' Kagami-Kun growled over a shakuhachi solo. 'I saw a man running off when I got out. He didn't do anything to you, did he?'

'No. He was as surprised as me.'

'Ah. Something like _that _again, huh? Man, off the court that lack of presence you have is really troublesome.'

'Your empathy moves me.'

'Tch.'

_Flush~_

Tetsuya flinched as a jet of cold water squirted him on the bum before he could stand up.

The soap dispenser (it dripped strawberry smelling goo on his hands), sink nozzle and dryer worked automatically when he put his hands under them.

He tapped Kagami-Kun on the shoulder. He jumped.

'You done?' he asked, peeking over his shoulder. 'Alright. Let's go.'

_Ding!_

_Zzz..._

They stepped back out into the mall, and Tetsuya had just wondered what they might look like when,

'Kagami! Kuroko!' Hyuuga-Senpai gawked at them from the normal toilet line. Kiyoshi-Senpai waved from behind him.

'Did you two just leave the toilet together?' he laughed.

* * *

_Notes and translations_

This happened to me on holiday. I went into one of those tech toilets because they were more private than ordinary ones. How ironic that the electric door opened early when I was in there. An old guy started to walk in! I cried 'whoa!' and rushed to pull up my shorts. I don't know who was more shocked.


	5. Basketball and Sumo

_Autumn Games_

Summary: Between the summer Interhigh and the Winter Cup, there was autumn. Stories from on and off the court. Chapter 5: 'What I mean,' the Sumo Club captain elaborated, 'is I want you to have a s_umo wrestling _match with us.'

I don't own Kuroko's Basketball. Fujimaki Tadatoshi does.

* * *

Chapter 5: Basketball and Sumo

A silence fell over the gym. The Basketball Club rose from various stages of squatting to stare at Koganei-Senpai and the huge, stern-faced boy behind him in the doorway.

'Uh, can I help you?' Aida-Senpai asked him.

'I want to speak with the Basketball Club captain,' said the huge boy. He was wearing a blue robe over a loin cloth. _Did he walk across school dressed like that?_ Tetsuya wondered.

'That's me,' Hyuuga-Senpai spoke up. 'What's up Hitsugaya?'

'I'm the captain of the Sumo Wrestling Club. Your club member here,' he jerked his head at Koganei-Senpai, 'has disrupted our practise and messed up our club room.'

'I said I'm sorry!' Koganei-Senpai protested. 'I'll clean it all up!'

'I have something else in mind.' Hitsugaya-Senpai had a gleam in his eyes. 'Do you have an important game coming up?' he asked Hyuuga-Senpai.

'Not this week,' the Basketball captain said.

'Good. I want the Basketball Club to have a match with the Sumo Club.'

Exclamations of surprise broke out.

'Eh!?'

'Is he serious?' Kagami-Kun frowned.

'We'll crush them! They're all huge, but they're not basketball players!'

Tetsuya had a feeling that Hitsugaya-Senpai didn't mean a basketball match.

'What I mean,' the Sumo Club captain elaborated, 'is I want you to have a s_umo wrestling _match with us.'

And the gym was silent again.

XXX xxx XXX

The Sumo Club's training room was a small dojo not far from the gymnasium. In the middle of the floor was a raised square platform of hard clay, dusted with sand. In the centre was a circle of partly buried rice bales and two parallel white painted lines.

Including the captain, there were thirteen students in loin cloths (and top-knots if their hair was long enough) doing stretches. They all bowed as Hitsugaya-Senpai lead the Basketball Club in. They scowled at Koganei-Senpai, who had popped in for a look and split food on the floor.

'Everyone,' Hitsugaya-Senpai announced, 'today the Sumo Club and the Basketball Club are going to wrestle together.'

'Eh!?'

'Really, captain?'

'We'll crush them!'

Seirin's basketball club all paled.

'The demonstration match will be ceremonial, but the rest will be training style. First of all, Aida-San, I need the weights of everyone in the basketball club, for match ups.' The sumo captain gave Aida-Senpai a notepad to write down everyone's weight. When she was done, he looked through a file of stats to make comparisons.

'By the way, Aida-San, how much do you weigh?'

'Excuse me?'

'How much do you weigh? We have three female members.' The three sumo girls grinned at her. They wore loin cloths and breast-bands.

'Oh my god, she'll be snapped like a twig!' Furihata-Kun whispered, looking at their coach's skinny frame.

'49 kilograms.'

'Huh.' Hitsugaya-Senpai scanned her. 'Koshimae-Chan, I'll pair you together. Kinomoto-Chan and Daidouji-Chan will do the demonstration match.'

'Yes captain!'

'As for the boys...' he read out the pairings, few of which were encouraging.

'Before we begin, boys, take off your shirts. Aida-San, do you have P.E. clothes with you?'

'Yes.'

'OK. The girl's changing room is over there. Everyone line up by that wall when you're ready.'

XXX xxx XXX

They settled around the dohyo in seiza (except for the teacher advisers, who had chairs) as Kinomoto-San and Daidouji-San mounted it and turned to face outwards. They clapped their hands loudly, turned towards each other and stomped the floor, to drive evil spirits away from the ring, as Hitsugaya-Senpai had explained.

The wrestlers left the ring to rinse their mouths from two cups on a table and returned to glare at each other from the white lines, squatting, hands on knees. They clapped again and spread their hands to show they had no weapons. Next, they went to their corners to gather salt from a wooden box. The girls tossed the salt into the ring to purify it.

The glaring and purifying rites were repeated twice (and the basketball players were beginning to fidget) before the wrestlers suddenly sprang into action.

'Whoa!' someone gasped in surprise.

Daidouji-San and Kinomoto-San collided mid-ring with a _smack!_ They shoved and slapped at each other. Kinomoto-San ducked down shunted her body into the other girls, shuffling her out of the circle.

'The winner is Kinomoto-Chan!'

The girls bowed to Hitsugaya-Senpai and stepped down from the dohyo.

'That's how we have an official match, Basketball Club,' Hitsugaya-Senpai addressed them. 'But we'll do practise matches together today. First up are Kaiba-Kun and Hyuuga-Kun.'

'Good luck, Hyuuga.' Koganei-Senpai clapped a grim Hyuuga-Senpai on the back as he stood up.

'Try not to get killed,' said Kiyoshi-Senpai, grasping his shoulder.

'If you win I'll let you have the rest of today off!'

'Crush him, Kaiba!'

'Destroy him!'

'Do your best, Hyuuga-Senpai.'

Kaiba-Kun was around Hyuuga-Senpai's height, but he was broader and heavier. He leered at Hyuuga-Senpai from his side of the ring.

'Get into position,' commanded Hitsugaya-Senpai. 'You go when I clap, on three. Ready? One, two, three!'

_Clap!_

Kaiba-Kun shot forward and ploughed into Hyuuga-Senpai.

'Urh!'

Within a couple of seconds, he was pushed out of the circle.

'The winner is Kaiba-Kun!'

XXX xxx XXX

The basketball club lost each match within seconds, even with Aida-Senpai's coach advice until Kiyoshi-Senpai stepped onto the dohyo.

'Let's have fun~' he grinned at his opponent, a very heavy looking boy with spiky hair.

The boy grinned back.

'Ready? One, two, three!'

_Clap!_

'Hah!'

_Slap!_

'Uh!'

Kiyoshi-Senpai dug his feet in and crouched low. His arms strained around Usami-Kun's waist.

'Hang on, Kiyoshi!'

'You can do it, Kiyoshi-Senpai!'

'Come on, Usami!'

Usami-Kun grunted and grabbed Kiyoshi-Senpai's thigh. The taller boy stumbled and was pushed out of bounds.

'Aww!'

'The winner is Usami-Kun!'

Kiyoshi-Senpai smiled at him before rejoining his team mates at the wall.

'That was the longest time so far,' Tsuchida-Senpai told him.

'Whoever stays in the longest or wins gets their training halved today,' Aida-Senpai said.

Mitobe-Senpai lasted a bit longer than Kiyoshi-Senpai, putting him in the lead.

'Alright Mitobe!' Koganei-Senpai high-fived him. 'Having lots of relatives to wrestle with really comes in handy, huh?'

'Not fair!'

'Sakurazuka-Kun and Kuroko-Kun, your turn.'

The sumo boy who stepped onto the dohyo was the lightest in his team, but still taller and nearly twenty kilos heavier than Tetsuya. He flinched in surprise as Tetsuya appeared before him.

'Where did he come from?' someone from the sumo club whispered.

'I thought basketball payers were all tall.'

'Easy win.'

'Do your best, Kuroko!'

'Do your ignite pass on him!'

_Keep calm. Hitsugaya-Senpai won't let Sakurazuka-Kun (or is he a senpai?) hurt me. Much. Keep calm ... it's the Japanese lunchtime rush... no! Forget that meme joke the first years started. Observe Sakurazuka-Kun. Should I grab his leg? Sweep step? _

'Ready? One, two, three!'

_Clap!_

Sakurazuka-Kun lunged at Tetsuya so fast he instinctively ducked down to the left. The other boy hesitated for a moment as his opponent disappeared from sight. Tetsuya took advantage of this and pushed both his palms into Sakurazuka-Kun's right side as he was looking the other way, making him stumble.

'Yes! Go Kuroko!'

'Sakurazuka-Kun!'

Unfortunately, Sakurazuka-Kun regained his footing and found Tetsuya. He grabbed him around the waist and lifted him off his feet. Before he knew it, Sakurazuka-Kun was setting him down firmly outside the circle.

'Not bad, basketball boy,' said Sakurazuka-Kun. 'If you weighed more you might have had me.'

Tetsuya smiled a little.

'Whoa, that was close, Kuroko,' Koganei-Senpai said as he rejoined his team.

'Good use of your basketball skills.'

'Your misdirection is incredible, Kuroko.'

Aida-Senpai was next, dressed in a sports bra and shorts. She was rigid as she stepped onto the dohyo with Koshimae-San.

'Everyone cheer for her or else!' Hyuuga-Senapi hissed. 'Go Aida!'

'Do your best!'

'Go Aida-Senpai!'

'You can do it, coach!'

Aida-Senpai pursed her lips and scanned Koshimae-San.

'Ready? One, two, three!'

_Clap!_

Their coach moved fast. She seized Koshimae-San's middle and inside swept her right foot while twisting their bodies around with all her strength.

_Thump!_

Koshimae-San stomped her foot down hard pushed Aida-Senpai back.

'Out! Both of you stepped out of bounds!'

'Eh!?'

The girls looked down and sure enough, both of them had a foot outside the circle.

'This match is a draw!'

'Yes! Way to go Aida!'

'Awesome, coach!'

Aida-Senpai grinned and gave her team the peace sign. Koshimae-San eyed her speculatively and said,

'That was some quick thinking, Aida-San.'

'Thanks, Koshimae-San.'

The senpai-tachi all high-fived Aida-Senpai as she rejoined them.

'Are you OK?' Hyuuga-Senpai asked, handing her a drink bottle.

'Yeah.'

'Good job.'

'I know. Oi, Kagami-Kun.'

'Kagami-Kun and Chitose-Kun are up now!'

'Yes coach?' Kagami-Kun asked, standing up.

'Don't do anything lame up there.'

'Yeah,' Kiyoshi piped up, 'If Aida can draw against someone nearly twice her weight, you should be able to win.'

'What kind of encouragement is this? You didn't win either!'

'You're our last hope for victory.'

'Do your best, Kagami!'

Tetsuya smiled at Kagami-Kun and gave him two thumbs up.

'We believe in you, Kagami-Kun. Anyway, Hitsugaya-Senpai won't let Chitose-Kun hurt you too much. You'll be fine.'

'That's not helpful at all!' he scowled.

'Your opponent's strongest point is his upper body strength, Kagami-Kun,' Aida-Senpai told him. 'Brace yourself and don't let him push you off balance.'

Chitose-Kun looked to be the biggest on the sumo team. Kagami-Kun's body was tight with nerves, but he glared at Chitose-Kun determinedly.

'Ready?' Hitsugaya-Senpai wore an interested expression that caught Tetsuya's attention. The sumo captain ran his gaze over Kagami-Kun, eyebrows lifting in approval.

'One, two, three!'

_Clap!_

The two boys were quickly locked together. Chitose-Kun heaved and shoved at Kagami-Kun, but his legs were fixed firmly in a near parallel stance, feet turned slightly inward, centre of gravity low. The sumo boy slapped, slammed, and shouldered him and tried to uproot his legs, but somehow Kagami-Kun held his position.

'Yes! Go Kagami!'

'Hang in there!'

'Come on, Chitose! Push him harder!'

Chitose-Kun pulled back ever so slightly to recover himself, and that was all Kagami-Kun needed to explode forward, springs in his legs releasing all their power at once. The sumo boy stumbled out of the circle and a second later, Kagami-Kun fell out landed on his bum.

'... The winner is Kagami-Kun!'

The basketball club cheered loudly, overpowering the groans of dismay from the sumo wrestling club.

'Alright Kagami!'

'Nice!'

'Aww, Chitose! Not cool!'

'Shut it, Kaiba!' growled Chitose-Kun. 'He just surprised me. I'll beat him next time.'

Hitsugaya-Senapi was smiling faintly as he listened to his club members grumble and swear revenge.

'Thank you, Hyuuga-Kun,' he murmured quietly. 'I've missed this spirited whinging.'

'I'm not surprised,' Hyuuga-Senpai replied. 'Nine consecutive losses?'

'Hm. The basketball circuit isn't the only place with monsters. You should see some of the girls. If there was still a place for professional female sumo wrestlers...'

Tetsuya's mind was filled with the image of huge, growling women as strong as Murasakibara-Kun and he shivered. Wow.

'This will be a good experience for us, too,' Aida-Senpai chirped, eyes gleaming. 'What fantastic leg strength sumo wrestlers have! How many stomps do you do each day?'

Slipping away from them, Tetsuya picked up his drink bottle and sat on the floor with his team mates to wait for their captains to finish the practise.

* * *

_Notes and translations_

I forget, what does everyone called Riko? Coach? Riko-Senpai? Aida-San?

Details about sumo rites taken from _Young Samurai: the Ring of Sky_, by Chris Bradford. In real life a sumo wrestler might be paired with someone much bigger than them, but this is a high school practise match. Hitsugaya doesn't want the basketball club to get hurt.

_Keep calm and carry on._ The original was a motivation quote from a World War.

_Dohyo_ – sumo wrestling ring

_Dojo_ – training hall

_Tachi_ – plural. Instead of adding an 's'. _Senpai-tachi_ means _senpais_.


End file.
